What is happiness for you? Just
take a moment and think for a while.
What was the first thing that
struck your mind? Was it your family? Your career? Money? or your health? I know most of us will
still debate whether money can buy happiness. Half of us will say that we can earn money when our health is at its best and half of us will say that we can be healthy, only when we have the money to
maintain our health.
Yes, both perspectives are true!
So what is real happiness then? Being able to buy anything without looking at
the price tag? Or being able to get in touch with any family member without any
hesitation? (ugh…did I just pierce your heart? My bad). Actually, we don’t know
what kind of happiness are we searching for? We need everything. We want that
house, that job position, that perfect spouse who gives you a beautiful
surprise frequently, the insta-perfect photograph, matching shoes, matching
watch, the newly launched car, what else? The list goes on.
Now let’s think for a moment.
Do those materials really matter? How many of you had a good conversation with
your family recently? Yeah I know there are some of us belonging to families
with broken relationships. Some of us have already lost one / both of our
parents and juggling with life. We often
spent our time just thinking about our loved ones and the time that we had
spent together. Some of us might be tolerating the toxic behavior of stepmom/dad. So home or family might not be the source of happiness for us. However, some of us were raised in institutional homes and did not
get a chance to know who our parents were. For us, it’s a dream to have a family,
to have dinner together, and to celebrate occasions together. So for us, the
biggest void in our life would be the family.
So what is happiness for all of us? Do we care
about our bank balance or do we wish for a friend or family member with whom we
could have shared our day while having dinner? Is there anyone to
celebrate your accomplishment or do you have a shoulder to cry your heart
out? Can you remember the time when
someone asked you about your day? When was the last time you hung out with your
friends? Or do you have any friends? Ask yourself! Do you know which plants are
there in your kitchen garden? And who planted those? When was the last time you
talked with someone about your problems? Or do you ever bother to seek help? If not, why aren’t you? Is it because there is no one or is it because you
are surrounded by a crowd but full of strangers? We all will have one answer
for this, “it’s complicated” ……..period!!!
Well, the meaning of happiness varies
with the person. For some, the family can be the source of their happiness
whereas someone might be dealing with the toxic environment of their family and
relatives and want to just leave their hometown- while some are compelled to
leave their home country to support their family economically. For some of us, it is not necessary to hang out with friends and party all day long. We just
want to stay in our homes, rest, and read a book. Some of us need a good talk
with our loved ones to let out all the mental burden while some just need a day
break in nature, a trek, or just an hour of meditation to recharge
ourselves. Some of us might be striving
to achieve our goal and the ultimate goal of ours may be a position or a
promotion for which we are working day and night like a donkey. Yeah! You heard
it right like a donkey cause at the end of the day you are responsible for your
efforts and your success. No one is going to do it for you! Hence, we need to
respect each other's decisions and life choices. We are not going to be happy
with others' life choices or ways of living. We have our own priorities and needs
for which we are working. We don’t know who is dealing with what kind of
problem in their life and yes circumstances do compel us to make decisions that
we had never ever thought of.
Everyone is trying their best to
deal with their life circumstances and find happiness within their
surroundings. And yes, happiness does not have any definition! It can be
created within us and we do not need any validation from others. If it makes us
happy just by sitting at home then it is happiness for some of us, if are
we ok with our 9-5 job rather than going to long fieldwork then that is happiness
for some of us and yeah making several round trips for office work, delving
into a different culture is giving happiness then that is also fine. The meaning of happiness is different for all.
Someone’s reason for happiness might be someone’s most hated thing. We are as
unique as our fingerprints and there is no need to take the validation of our
happiness from anyone. We are the drivers of our journey and we have our own
chosen path. So if someone is trying their best to put their life together,
let’s support them rather than throwing our belief of real happiness and stop
poking our noses in others’ business.
Let’s live and also let others live in their own way.